So tonight is one of those nights where I just want to write...

Here is the funny thing about me blogging. It is like a weird way for me to make wishes. Now, here me out on this. You know how if you were ever to get stranded on an island, what would you do after all else fails? You would write a message in a bottle of course! Knowing full well that no one may ever receive it, but hey if you tried everything else out, what can it hurt right? It is like maybe if I just express myself and send it out into the cyber world something will happen. And something does happen, I feel better. haha So that is why I choose to write. It is one of the few times I ever really actually WANT to write. ha 

I have come to realize that I know nothing.
I know, it took me awhile folks, but I got there. I truly do not know anything about, well, just about everything. ha 
I have found that I look at the world and work so hard to make sense out of other people's actions and their motives. I try so hard to understand. I try so hard to make some sense out of it all, but in the end the only sense I ever make is nonsense. 




But I have come to understand even more that the only one who ever makes any sort of sense is the Lord. I have come to realize how much I truly just need to rely on Him always. Cause honestly, I have no clue what I am doing down here. I basically am no better than a chicken running around with its head cut off. ha I am not saying that I shouldn't try to understand things or try hard to figure things out. I definitely do and I will always try, but the process to understanding goes much smoother when you involve God. 
In this crazy always changing world, He is the only constant in my life. And that I do know. And oh my, oh my am I grateful for it. God is unchanging. His doctrine is the same. His message is the same, to come unto Him. The Atonement of Christ is always there for me.

                        Everyone needs some stability in this life because life is crazy. :)

Lake Powell...

So, Lake Powell was amazing!!! I loved being on the lake and doing something that I love. I also got to get to know a lot of people in my HUGE ward here! Which was a definite plus.

It rained a lot while we were there. Almost everyday for like maybe an hour, but man! We had some beautiful rainbows because of it!

This is the Houseboat I was lucky to stay on. It was three stories and really nice! It was a good houseboat to be on for my first time ever stepping foot on one. The Hancock's, Brother Hancock serves in the bishopric, were so nice to open it up to our ward.

Just some of the views we had from the houseboat.

When we were not out on a boat or a jet ski we had fun going off the slides and jumping off from the top, just doing random tricks and what not.

This is my beautiful and wonderful roommate, Kristen, just chilling in the water. 

Some people thought we were a little ridiculous because we were super excited to be at Lake Powell... Ok, so we almost cried at the sight of the Lake, but hey, it is Lake Powell so I feel justified.

OVERALL: The trip was a success! I am so glad I got to go to Lake Powell!

Sidenote!!!

Jackson lost his first tooth! It was while I was off at Lake Powell, but I babysat him when I got back and he told me all about it and how the tooth fairy came to visit him :)

He was a happy boy and I was an ecstatic                aunt! 

Hey y'all! So I have just decided to start blogging. I really do not know what I am doing and right now I have no fun pictures or anything because I just got my camera in operating condition! But hopefully I will be able to post pictures soon! But any pointers or tips about blogging would be much appreciated! haha Since I have no adventurous photos as of now, I guess my random thoughts will do. I think writing this will be more for my benefit than for anyone else! But hopefully it can in some small way help you out too! If I don't kill you with boredom that is! haha

Mostly I have been thinking about how life throws you curve balls. My life has been taking some crazy turns lately and there are times that I feel like I have been blind-sided by a big Samoan linebacker. Ever feel like that? ha There are some things that I desperately want in life, but I need to be patient. This is one of the hardest things in life for me.. to be patient. I like to plan. I like to do. I do not like to wait and hope things get done as they should. But right now, I feel like all my plans are running thin, slipping away through any random crack they happen to come across. I know that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing right now, but time is passing me by and my future is foggier than well, fog itself. And I hate that.

Right now there are just so many options for me...There is not just a fork in the road, but several different paths, all of which are good, but I am just not sure which one to travel down or even when to begin the journey. Which one is best? You can see why this occupies my mind, right? But the worst is when you there are things you want the most and you just simply cannot have them. You go towards them, but you never reach them. That is where I feel the most toil on myself; these paths that I can see, but there is a sign that says, "Cannot tread upon, indefinitely". And what makes this even worse is when you know you MISSED your chance to go down that path.  You saw that it was a path you would love to pursue; a path you would do just about anything to get even the chance to travel on and because of you, you missed it. It was clean and beautiful. It looked promising. And it was open, just waiting for you to come. So, you walk towards it, but as you get closer you start to slow down. You are not sure if this path is as welcoming as you thought. And then when you decide to finally take the chance and run, jump, and skip onto the trail it closes right in front of you. And when you hit that sign that is telling you this path is closed for now and who knows if it will ever be opened again to you, you fell like you were blind-sided. Like you never saw it coming, although there were small signs telling you to act now, yet you brushed them off. Not giving them much thought. Yep, those ones. These are the ones I am talking about. You stand right by them, but in stubbornness you expect the path to come to you, rather than you come to it; as if the path had something to prove to you. I did that. And I feel like I have missed my chance on something that could have been wonderful. And that is what hurts the most. It could have taught me so much and brought so much joy into my life and yet, I failed to take the proper steps to give it a go.

But, I am grateful for the opportunity for growth. To learn. To come closer to my Heavenly Father. And for that I am jubilant! I love love love living by the temple! For whenever things are just too confusing, hard, or I just need some peace I drive to the temple, that is only a few minutes away, and I will sit outside of it for hours. I may go inside the visitor center. And on Thursday nights I am usually inside of the temple. It is sooo amazing for me to have the temple so close! What a blessing! For me, when life throws me another curve ball or a path I wished to travel on closes I turn to family, friends, but also the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I go to His temples and I find peace and joy. I may not always get the answers I am looking for and the answers may not always come right away, but I feel and know of God's love for me and I know everything will be alright. He is an all-knowing God. He wants me to grow. And He, in His perfect love for me, wants what is best for me.